Investment Advice

Posted by Admin on October 09, 2008
Jokes, WTF? / Comments Off on Investment Advice

Subject: Investment advice even I understand!

  • If you had purchased $1,000 of Delta Air Lines stock one year ago, you would have $49 left.
  • With Enron, you would have $16.50 left.
  • With World Com, you would have less than $5 left.
  • But if you had purchased $1,000 worth of beer one year ago, drank all of the beer, then turned in the cans for the aluminum recycling, the REFUND would have been $214.


Based on the above, the best current investment advice is to drink heavily and recycle.

It’s called the 401-Keg…..

Credit Card Scams

Posted by Admin on August 09, 2008
Personal / Comments Off on Credit Card Scams

So I just paid down my personal credit card to $0 for the first time in about 4 years and I’m pretty proud of myself.  While enjoying the moment by admiring my current balance through the online banking website, my happiness was interrupted by a charge for $9.10 from “Center Company”.

Before calling the credit card company to contest the charge, I wanted to make sure it wasn’t something I’d bought and forgotten about.  So I went to Google (as you do), and it turns out I wasn’t the only person with this experience.

Sure enough, $9 charges everywhere.  So I called the Citibank Credit Cards, and to my surprise it wasn’t an off-shored call center!  I digress.  Then, the representative went through some basic Q&A as a matter of process when disputing a charge, and the screen popped-up: resolved.  The representative claimed that she’d never seen that one before.  It was clearly it’s a scam and clearly Citibank Credit Cards is aware.  I just wish they had credited my account rather than me having to call about it.

Ahem.

The optimist in me hopes that I jumped on it before they had a chance to.

Dogs and Cats: Diaries

Posted by Admin on April 06, 2008
Jokes, Personal / Comments Off on Dogs and Cats: Diaries

** Excerpts from a Dog’s Diary **

8:00 am – Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am – A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am – A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am – Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm – Lunch! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm – Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm – Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm – Milk bones! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm – Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm – Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm – Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!

** Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary **

Day 983 of my captivity.

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.

Today , I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of, however, they merely made condescending comments about what a “good little hunter” I am.

Bastards!

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of “allergies.” I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow — but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released – and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.

The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe… For now…

Express

Posted by Admin on March 05, 2008
Eats / 2 Comments

DessertSo here I am, working in Montreal.  It’s one of those places you must go and visit… maybe not in the heart of winter though.  For dinner, my friend Eric recommended that I check out a place called Express in the French Quarter, at 3927 Saint-Denis, a 5 minute walk from the Sherbrooke station on the orange subway line.

It’s a bistro in every sense of the word. Imagine a stainless steel bar and simple but elegant dining. The food was spectacular and the service was great. You’ve got to check this place out if you’re ever in Montreal. Expect to spend about $50 with an appetizer, entree, dessert and a glass of wine.

Montreal

Posted by Admin on March 04, 2008
Travel / Comments Off on Montreal

Montreal SubwayThis is my second time working in Montreal, and unlike the last time I was here, the weather is bearable. I thought I could handle the cold after spending a few years in upstate New York, but the winters here are hardcore!

I finally ventured out around town after work and got to explore the subway. The trains here run on tires, are clean and quiet. It’s a big difference from what I’m used to in NYC. Also noteworthy, a train ride costs $2.75 – 37% more than in New York City. Interesting.

I was most impressed by the extent to which you can get around town underground. From hotel to shopping complex to subway – it seems like there are intricate tunnels connecting many buildings.  I suppose this is out of necessity, given how cold it gets here in the winter. It’s a nice city with a real European flair. I can’t wait to explore some more.

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