JT's Blog

JT's little piece of the internet.

Archive for July, 2006

Jul-24-2006

Cool Signature

__________________
Jesus saves, but Buddah makes incremental backups.
I’m sorry but my karma ran over your dogma.

Posted under Personal
Jul-21-2006

STDs

The Center for Disease Control has issued a warning about a new virulent strain of Sexually Transmitted Disease. The disease is contracted through dangerous and high-risk behavior.

The disease is called Gonorrhea Lectim and pronounced “gonna re-elect him.” Many victims contracted it in 2004, after having been screwed for the past four years.

Naturalists and epidemiologists are amazed at how this destructive disease originated only a few years ago from a bush found in Texas.

Posted under Jokes
Jul-10-2006

Rules to live by

  1. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
  2. Don’t worry about what people think, they don’t do it very often.
  3. Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian anymore than standing in a garage makes you a car.
  4. Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
  5. If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you’ve never tried before.
  6. My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.
  7. Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious.
  8. A person, who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person. (This is very important. Pay attention! It never fails.)
  9. For every action, there is an equal and opposite government program.
  10. If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip.
  11. Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.
  12. A conscience is what hurts when all of your other parts feel so good.
  13. Eat well, stay fit, die anyway.
  14. Men are from earth. Women are from earth. Deal with it.
  15. No man has ever been shot while doing the dishes.
  16. A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.
  17. Middle age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places.
  18. Opportunities always look bigger going than coming.
  19. Junk is something you’ve kept for years and throw away three weeks before you need it.
  20. There is always one more imbecile than you counted on.
  21. Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.
  22. By the time you can make ends meet, they move the ends.
  23. Thou shalt not weigh more than thy refrigerator.
  24. Someone who thinks logically provides a nice contrast to the real world.
  25. It ain’t the jeans that make your butt look fat.
  26. If you had to identify, in 1 word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, & never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be “meetings.”
  27. There is a very fine line between “hobby” and “mental illness.”
  28. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.
  29. You should not confuse your career with your life.
  30. Nobody cares if you can’t dance well. Just get up and dance.
  31. Never lick a steak knife.
  32. The most destructive force in the universe is gossip.
  33. You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight savings time.
  34. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she’s pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.
  35. There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age eleven.
  36. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above average drivers.
  37. Your friends love you anyway.
  38. Thought for the day: Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic.
Posted under Jokes
Jul-9-2006

iRiver hope

Inspired by my unwillingness to sellout and get an iPod after my iRiver woes from last week, I searched around the internet for iRiver H300 replacement batteries. To my surprize, eBay is crawling with them. I guess there’s a real aftermarket! (thinly vailed dig at iRiver) It would stand to reason, therefore, that somebody out there knows how to crack open the iRiver and replace the battery. Sure enough!

Since things have a way of dissapearing on the interent, I have taken the liberty of copying that web page into this PDF (1.2MB). Credit to a guy named Denny, from the UK, and to Misticriver.net – for iRiver enthusiasts.

Posted under Personal
Jul-9-2006

Belle’s Cafe

kfok.jpgWesthampton Airport (also knownas Francis S. Gabreski, or KFOK), is home to a little restaurant called Belle’s Cafe.

Located about 50nm West of New York City, and once a military airbase, this airport is now mainly a civilian home to general aviation, with an occasional C130 flying in.

When you land, taxi to the base of the tower, shut down, hop out, and go enjoy some great food.

I contributed this little review to the airnav.com website:


bellesheading.jpg

A small cozy place with home-cooked food. The value is not in the presentation, but in the flavors. The Carribean and Cajun inspired dishes depart from anything you’ll find this far North. Don’t ruin your appetite with the Corn Chowder and warm Corn Bread. I followed the intro with Lobster Bisque, and Seared Catfish. You don’t really find sweet potato mash very often. There are also dishes for the less adventuresome – steak, pork chops, shrimp etc. Expect the shell on your shrimp, and you’re expected to eat with your hands.

The food and the pace are relaxed, and really contrast with NYC, just 50 NM to the East. This is not a place for a 15 minute meal on the run. Expect to wait if you arrive at peak hours, and expect not to be rushed while you eat. It may seem a little pricey, but considering it’s basically a home cooked meal, and considering you just FLEW IN for dinner, there’s no complaining about the price. A friend and I gorged ourselves on the day’s top-priced specials for about $75 total, with tip. There’s live music on weekends, which may be a little loud if you want intimate conversation. It’s BYOB if your passengers want an alcoholic beverage, so pack a cooler; otherwise, they have the standard soda, water, etc., be sure to try the cinnamon ice tea. Also, consider yourself warned about the Key Lime Pie.

Much love to Didi (the owner).

Posted under Personal